gag me

13 comments:

Emery Calame said...

Oooh. I'll bet right about now he can see the black rabbit of Inle hopping around in the distance.

Brriiiggghhhttt Eeeeyyyyyeess!
Burning like Fiii-iiire!
Briiiigggghhhtt Eeeeeyyyeeess!
How Caaaan you Close and Faaaailll?

Jed said...

I'm actually started to feel bad for this guy. I mean, at least with one arm he looked like he might have a chance. Don't kill him please.

Mark Martin said...

Emery -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MODq81_cDKI

Sappy song, but I enjoyed the book and the movie

Jed -
Er uh - maybe you better not look at jabberous for the next couple of weeks...

greg said...

Don't kill him? You would want to be alive? The man has no legs, one arm, one eye, a touchable brain, and no skin.

Mark Martin said...

Don't forget the pimple.

Janet said...

Kill him...QUICK! ( I can't take much more...)

Emery Calame said...

Mark, I saw Watership Down when I was a little kid. I think I was seven years old. The black rabbit as portrayed in the movie absolutely terrified me.

I'm not sure why exactly. I saw stuff like Alien and Lord of the Rings (the ridiculous Bakshi version)not long after that with no problems whatsoever.

Maybe it was because the rabbit was so abstract (or even aboriginal) and maybe it was the way that the other rabbits were so scared of him.

Maybe it was the way that he hopped and disappeared, never quite reappearing where you thought he was. He didn't quite fit into the natural motion of the scenes he was in. He had his own slow floaty rythm, his own personal friction, his own unique gravity. He was a thing from another world, or perhaps from the depths of the mind. His eyes were empty. His ears looked a bit like horns. His shape changed, gaining and losing detail.

He seemed to be very dangerous without there being any real malice on his part. He was the lawn mower and the rabbits were the grass. "Nothing personal." :)

I guess my young mind just wasn't ready to deal with a cartoonish personification of death like that which almost looked like he was done in crayon or colored pencils.

I remember trying very hard (in the "mind over matter" sense) to somehow not see him there on the screen. I also remember hating him for killing the rabbits and scaring them, and wondering how I'd get away if he snuck up on me and started slowly hopping in place and then disappearing again only to reappear behind me.

Since I was seven, I knew that he wasn't real and the fact that I couldn't control my sense of revulsion made me feel kind of ashamed. Worse than that I clearly recognized that what he represented WAS real even if it couldn't be seen except perhaps by those about to die. And for the most part is was clear that there wasn't any way to help someone that the black rabbit was menacing.

Then again I used to get really freaked out by the green "dinosaur ghosts" in the back of the Little Golden Book of Dinosaurs.

http://homepage.mac.com/doubtboy/LittleGolden.html

The picture was just supposed to show the scale of the dinosaurs against modern day things like houses and cars. They showed the dinsaurs as ghostly transluscent green outlines of their volume. To me it implied that those poor dinosaurs were doomed to be these sad, isolated, green misty phantoms, wandering around invisibly while wishing they could touch the world again.

I get scared and bothered by the weirdest things.

Jed said...

I guess I changed my mind. Go ahead and put him out of his misery. But I do kind of have love for the little guy now. He's so earnest. He's sarcastic in the first scene, but it's clearly the sincerest form of sarcasm imaginable. This guy doesn't do anything halfway.

There should surely be a scene involving a dog, possibly chewing or wound licking. Brain licking even. Come on, brain-licking! That's just funny in itself.

Emery Calame said...

Just in case you were wondering, his right eye was my favorite masturbating eye!

Emery Calame said...

Maybe there should be an alternate ending (for Jed) where the guy is miraculously healed after being brought to the top of the Tower of Power of Jerry Clower.

Janet said...

Please Jed...don't encourage him! No dog!No chewing or licking! The old lady's gotta do it!

Jed said...

The old lady has to chew and lick him? And you tell ME not to encourage him?

Janet said...

Aargh!! Maybe I just need to tune back in when it's all over...as if these visuals aren't enough for me...the ones you're putting in my head are makin' me queasy!