elf trio

This is one of two tree stands we saw at the muddy flea market. Ten bucks! Plus the extra buck I spent for a screwdriver to dismantle it so it would fit in our checked bag. But the checked bag was overweight and they were going to charge us A HUNDRED DOLLARS EXTRA, so we had to take some stuff out and put it in our carry-on bags. Go figure. All of the weight ended up on the plane anyway, so what was accomplished?

So I took out the heaviest thing - this metal tree stand, wrapped in a towel, and put it in my shoulder bag. Which had to go through the X-ray screener, which caused the airport cop to pull me aside and say "What's in the bag?" I started to unwrap it, but as soon as he saw the painted elf he said "Oh, OK," and that was that. I never even finished unwrapping it. So here's a tip: If you want to smuggle a metal hatchet blade onto an airplane, just paint it like an elf and you'll float right in.

We used it for a centerpiece on the food table at the Open House party. But I forgot to light the candle. I bet it would have been prettier with the candle lit.

I have no idea where you find trees with trunks skinny enough to fit in that skinny tube. Somewhere in Prague I guess.


HemlockMan said...

You could have been a terrorist from the Earth Liberation Front (ELF)! That airport cop wasn't doing his job!!!

Victor Resistor said...

You could use it to display a human bone on your dining table for when cannibals come to dinner.

jerelle kraus said...

Exquisite words & shots, Mark.